Harry Reid: I’m Santa This Year

Posted on Sun 12/20/2009 by

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By Scooter Van Neuter

WASHINGTON (SR) – Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid is vowing to “deliver the goods” in passing the Senate health care reform legislation on Christmas Eve.

“This Christmas I’m Santa Claus, and me and my elves are bringing every person in America the biggest, most expensive present they’ve ever received,” said Reid in an interview yesterday. “It’s so huge it may not even fit down the chimney, hahaha.”

Senate leaders have been working round the clock to finalize their 10-year, trillion dollar bill in time for the final vote on Christmas Eve, despite the fact that the majority of Americans adamantly do not want it.

One unnamed Republican senator bristled at Reid’s comparing himself to Santa, saying, “Since when did Santa turn into a Godless, dried-up, bony old baby-killing socialist? The Antichrist maybe, but he’s definitely not Santa.”

“You can put a pretty bow on a pile of sh*t, but that doesn’t make it a present anyone would want,” said another Senate member. “I’ll tell you one thing, when that little gift from Hell flies down the chimney and hits the fire, the stench will be so bad voters will still be smelling it next election.”

My comments: Damn, I was hoping for an I-Pod!

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