Obama Inauguration Highlights

Scooter’s Report – Satire

WASHINGTON (SR) – Barack Obama took office Tuesday as the 44th president of the U.S., and Scooter’s Report was there. Here are what I consider to be some of the highlights of this momentous occasion:

• The Obamas each sported elaborate and dazzling custom-designed “grills” for the event, the first President-elect and wife to do so.
• Mr. Obama was sworn in on a Bible once used by Abraham Lincoln. Unfortunately, afterward it was found that Mr. Obama’s handprint had somehow ”burned” into the cover and scorched the first 50 pages. How or why this happened is not known.
• Mrs. Obama wore a beautiful designer dress that many said made her look “remarkably human and feminine.”
• In what was unquestionably the most dramatic traditional first dance for a new President and First Lady, the Obamas “got down” to Hip Hop artist Master P’s “Dope, Pus*y, And Money.” The First Lady’s spirited “booty shake” ignited the crowd while President Obama’s ”doggy style” showed this world leader has all the right moves.
• Poet Elizabeth Alexander’s recital of her poem, “Praise Song For The Day” was one of the more memorable moments, proving to millions of children that no matter how little talent one has, it’s more than enough to get you included in a presidential inauguration some day.
• In a rousing show of emotion, several times during the ceremony the huge crowd broke into chants of ”Obama, Obama, Obama…” amid a haze of cannabis and crack smoke that moved many, including yours truly, to tears.

This was a grand and historic event. In spite being mugged twice and having my car stolen, I came away with memories (and scars) that will last a lifetime.

President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama

Read More Satire from Scooter’s Report and Hilarious Comments